I have been married for 8 months and after getting married I found out that my husband cannot have children and he is often sick due to varicose veins in the calves. Of course this affects him with regard to intimacy with me, but he tries to put the blame on me all the time. He rebukes me and blames me for his shortcoming, although I am not like that, praise be to Allaah the Lord of the Worlds.
The point is that my problem is great indeed. About a month ago I found out that he commits sin (zina) in the chat rooms, and it is even worse than that, since I found out that he is like the people of Loot (i.e., homosexual). What should I do? Please note that whenever I speak about any subjects he says that I am wrong, he is the only one who is right, and my words and thinking are wrong. I hope that you will answer me. What should I do?.
Firstly:
If the husband is sterile and cannot have children then it is the woman’s right to demand an annulment of the marriage, because of this defect in the husband, as she has the right to have a child, and in fact that is one of the greatest aims of marriage. If it is not possible to have the marriage annulled then she may ask for a divorce and in that case he has to divorce her and give her her rights in full, like the delayed portion of the dowry, etc.
Secondly:
This husband’s rights over you are that you should advise him sincerely first of all. In the answer to question no. 7669 you will find information on how to advise him.
Thirdly:
If he does not respond to the advice, and he persists in the haraam things that he is doing, then there is nothing good for you in remaining with this husband, because he is not giving you your rights, and because he does this evil deed.
Now you are at the beginning of your marriage, and it is fortunate that you do not have a child from him. So hasten to seek a divorce, and if he refuses, then separate from him by means of khula’. May Allaah compensate you with someone better than him, and bless you with a righteous husband and righteous offspring who will bring you joy.
And Allaah knows best.
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