Praise be to Allaah.
It states in sharee’ah that the Muslim should not expose himself to harm.
That includes mixing with a person who has a contagious disease, especially if that disease is serious and chronic, such as herpes.
The rulings of sharee’ah are addressed to everyone, sick and healthy alike.
With regard to the one who is sick, Muslim (2221) narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The owner of sick camels should not bring them to the healthy ones” – lest the disease be transmitted to the healthy ones.
With regard to the one who is healthy, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Flee from the leper as you would flee from a lion.” Narrated by Ahmad, 9429; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 7530.
Leprosy is a well-known contagious disease – we ask Allaah to keep us safe and sound.
Muslim (2231) narrated from ‘Amr ibn al-Shareed that his father said: Among the delegation from Thaqeef there was a leper. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) sent word to him saying: “We have accepted your oath of allegiance; go back.”
Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Miftaah Daar al-Sa’aadah (2/272):
He sent word to that leper accepting his oath of allegiance so as to establish the shar’i principle of avoiding the causes of harmful and hateful things, because a person should not expose himself to the causes of harm.
Ibn al-Qayyim said in Zaad al-Ma’aad (4/147):
Chapter on the guidance of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) on avoiding contagious diseases and his advice to healthy people to avoid those who have such diseases. Then he quoted the ahaadeeth mentioned above.
Your wish to marry this man who has herpes may be influenced by emotion, and you think that you are being patient and forbearing, then if disaster strikes you will regret it when regret will be of no benefit. There is nothing to compare to good health.
Our advice to you is not to marry this person.
We ask Allaah to bless you with a righteous husband who will help you in your religious affairs.
And Allaah knows best.