which one deserves,.If one is good he/she will get a pios partener unless it is a test from ALLAH.
Unfortunattely i have not come across any hadith on this subject and could you please give me references and advice on this topic so that i can advice the brothere and sisters
I Have also been told that if a man does zina it will result in him being punishede by some female member of his family doing zina. Is this true ?
Many young muslims go about looking for a partener in the haram way .should i tell them that if they are pios they will definnalely get someones who is equally pios unless they are being tested by ALLAH?
because if this is true it may deter many a muslim from commiting haram and it may even make them more entuisianstic about becoming beter muslims.
What you have heard, that a man marries the person he
deserves and who is similar to him in terms of righteousness or immorality
is not correct. This is indicated by the following:
1 – The story that Allaah tells us of two of His noble
Prophets, namely Nooh and Loot (peace be upon them), whose wives were
disbelievers. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Allaah sets forth an example for those who disbelieve: the
wife of Nooh (Noah) and the wife of Loot (Lot). They were under two of our
righteous slaves, but they both betrayed them (their husbands by rejecting
their doctrine). So they [Nooh (Noah) and Loot (Lot)] availed them (their
respective wives) not against Allaah and it was said: ‘Enter the Fire along
with those who enter!’”
2 – Islam does not allow an adulterer to marry a chaste
woman, and it does not allow a chaste man to marry an adulteress. This
indicates that such a thing could happen, and indeed it happens often.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“The adulterer — fornicator marries not but an adulteress —
fornicatress or a Mushrikah; and the adulteress –fornicatress, none marries
her except an adulterer — fornicater or a Mushrik [and that means that the
man who agrees to marry (have a sexual relation with) a Mushrikah (female
polytheist, pagan or idolatress) or a prostitute, then surely, he is either
an adulterer — fornicator, or a Mushrik (polytheist, pagan or idolater). And
the woman who agrees to marry (have a sexual relation with) a Mushrik
(polytheist, pagan or idolater) or an adulterer — fornicator, then she is
either a prostitute or a Mushrikah (female polytheist, pagan, or
idolatress)]. Such a thing is forbidden to the believers (of Islamic
3 – The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) said that a woman may be married for her wealth, her beauty, her
lineage or her religious commitment, and the fact that he (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) encouraged marrying the one who is
religiously-committed indicates that marriages could occur for other
reasons, so a man might marry a woman who is not like him.
It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Woman are married for
four things: for their wealth, their lineage, their beauty and their
religious commitment. Marry the one who is religiously-committed, may your
hands be rubbed with dust (i.e., may you prosper).”
(Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4802; Muslim, 1466).
4 – The fact that the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) commanded guardians to marry the women under their care
to religiously-committed men indicates that something other than that could
It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah said: The Messenger of
Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If there
comes to you one with whose religious commitment and character you are
pleased, then marry (your daughter or other female relative under your care)
to him, for if you do not do that there will be tribulation in the land and
Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1084; Ibn Maajah, 1967. Classed as
saheeh by al-Albaani in al-Silsilah al-Saheehah, 1022.
So the one who is looking for a wife should look for one who
is religiously-committed and has a good character; similarly, woman’s
guardians should not marry them to anyone but those who are
religiously-committed. For a man is influenced by those with whom he keeps
company, especially if that lasts for a long time. The Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “A man will follow the way of his
close friend, so let each of you look at whom he takes as a close friend.”
(Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2378; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh
“A man will follow the way of his close friend” i.e., he will
follow the habits and path of his friends; “So let each of you look” means,
think long and hard about; “whom he takes as a close friend” means, whom he
regards as a friend and a brother. So if you like a person’s religious
commitment and character, take him as a close friend, and if not, then avoid
him. For characteristics are easily copied and keeping company with people
has an effect on whether you will be good or bad. Al-Ghazaali said: Sitting
with and mixing with one whose interest is worldly gain will make you also
seek worldly gains; sitting with and mixing with one who is an ascetic will
make you care little for worldly gains, because following characteristics
are easily copied and one could copy the characteristics of one's friend
without even realizing.
From Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi.
With regard to the adulterer, he may be punished with regard
to his family. A hadeeth to that effect was narrated, but it is mawdoo’
(fabricated), however the meaning may be correct. We have mentioned it, with
comment, in question no.
And Allaah knows best.